Thursday, December 30, 2010

Cunt face bitch.

Hello blog world I have come to the realization that I am a cunt face bitch. I have no filter, and sometimes people think I am Sue Sylvester. I'm not though I really try to be a nice person but then I do something bitchy. I usually feel justified about it too. Like I should be being a bitch to this person because they are doing it the "right" way or the way I would do it. Even now as I type this I am thinking that it would be the better way to get it done. HELP! How do you become a better person? I am open to suggestions, if I can manage not to bite your head off long enough to hear what you are saying.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

A Real ADVENTURE!

Happy Thursday blog world I thought I would share with you my little adventure from last night. I had to work till close with two of my co-workers so I volunteered to go start everyones cars so they would be nice and warm. I come back in we close up shop and start to head out... then neither of my co workers cars will open. They are sitting parked in the lot running and we are standing outside freezing our asses off. we are trying everything we can thing of looking like fools. So we decide to drive to one of the girls houses who lives close and get her spare set and the other girl has her brother bring her spare set. We get back and the key does nothing. again we are standing outside in the cold looking like dumb asses. The brother arrives and we get one car open. Okay 2 down one to go. So the damn Ford is the only thing standing between me (Did I mention that I was in a dress?) and the warmth of home. We try the trunk again, please open please open, and with a little persuasion it pops. Yes! So I slide right in that sucker trying to figure out hope to lay the seats down and praying that my co workers don't find this the perfect time to play a joke on me and lock me in the trunk. I my pushing and pulling kicking and scrapping and finally I find the latch. YES! I hit the latch lay down both seats and finally we are free. I a outta there like a bat outta hell and ready to get home to my warm bed and I think to myself is this how Cat woman felt after a long fight? Tired and ready to get outta the cold.

Friday, December 10, 2010

LOVE/HATE

I usually love, love, love the holidays all the way up until the planning comes. Every year I get so excited for Christmas and spending time with all my loved ones and then it comes time to split time up and my stress levels go through the roof. I hate splitting time; I wish I could just clone myself for two days and be able to experience it all and then my clone self join back together Christmas night so I can dwell on all my fond memories. I love all my family so much and I never want to leave no matter where we are yet I am always forced to tear myself away. I can understand why people loose the holiday spirit because when you start putting times constraints on quality time and watching the clock feeling the pressure that you have to rush you loose the holiday spirit. Each holiday experience offers its own unique joys though so I could never miss one. It makes me sad as the holidays draw closer that this is what the holidays become. Any thoughts or solutions??

Friday, November 26, 2010

SLUDGE...

So this is the down low on sludge, I am sure by the end of this I will regret having my name in the title of my blog. Sludge is what we in the know have named tarish nasty wipe 15 times and still feel dirty poop. Its so gross you feel that like you should probably shower after but you would still feel dirty. Now there are ways to know you will probably have a sludge:
1. Eating a lot of popcorn.
2. Eating Mexican food with a lot of beans.
3. Eating a lot of dairy products.
Now these are just a items that bring on the sludge in in me. I have decided that if I could magically have cottonelle moist wipes delivered whenever sludge happens I would be eternally grateful to the powers that be. So to every person out there beware of when sludge hits!

For the love of artichokes!

Hello blog world I am back.... Coming at you with love in my heart and yummy food in my tummy. Yesterday was one of the best Thanksgiving I have had in a very long time. All the food was so yummy and I love my family and spending time with them. I sometimes think I am the luckiest girl when it comes to family because we are all a priority to each other. One thing we all have in common is the deep and undying love for artichoke hearts mmmmm. They are so good in pasta or dip, or just dredged in flour and fried. Artichoke hearts are to the Squires family as shrimp were to Bubba's family on Forest Gump. So here is one of my holiday suggestions to all of you out there: explore the world of artichokes they are amazing and full of flavor and really bring something different to your next holiday dish.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Sorry for the failures to post recently I just have not been feeling the fire I guess. But now the fire is back and I am hoping it will be staying with me... So here it goes. Two nights ago I was watching TV with my husband I three times I say that I could go to Walmart at midnight and get "Call of Duty" as soon as its released and this just aggravated the shit outta me. There are many things that I do not like about Walmart to begin with but this just pushed me over the edge. How can the powers that be in the Walmart corporation say its ok to go out and kill people, citizens, other troops, ect? This is ok to sell to young kids however letting them hear shit, fuck, and bitch is crossing the proverbial line? When did we reach this point that killing was acceptable to practice in our living rooms the same as guitar hero while simple free speech is being limited and censored? Do I agree that all children should be exposed to cursing? I don't know I guess that is for a parent to decide. But if you ask any decent American parent if they would want their child exposed to murder the answer would be no. So I wonder where things are heading when it comes to leadership, social influences, and when will parents notice what their kids are "playing?" I am open for argument on this one if anyone has any feedback but I just do not understand....

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Holiday cheer!

Happy Thursday from the now Mrs. Pia Parrott....please stop laughing. Anyways now that the wedding is over I am feeling all the holiday cheer in the world! I got Baylee about 6 Christmas shirts and put her in one today. I just LOVE LOVE LOVE Christmas and I hope to share that love with my daughter so she has some of the same amazing memories I am so lucky to have. So I just wanted to say that I hope everyone appreciates the "reason for the season" and spends a little extra time with family and loved ones in the coming months!

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

I think its happened I have become a mom

Today I took a break only so I could go to the dollar store and get my 2 year old daughter a fake baby bottle for her Baby Go-Go. (She named her) She was trying to use Brandon's mini glass cleaner for a bottle but I a have a suspicion that she would put that in her own mouth so I nixed that pretty quick! However I remember when I was pre-child I would think women who I worked with were crazy for getting their kids every little thing they wanted however I do it all the time. If she isn't hurting someone else or herself then what does it matter. Is this how spoiled rich kids are raised? Today I only spent $1.50, no big deal but in 4 years when she is in grade school will I be running out to get a new shirt that she wants for $45? I wonder sometimes where I will draw the line or if I will be able to. I have no doubt Brandon will know where the line is but what if I avoid telling him just because I know he will say no. I can totally see myself doing that. So I am taking comments am I normal or am I going to turn my perfect little angel into a spoiled brat that thinks everything should be handed to her. Could you say no to that face? 

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Groceries... I am confused

So my love almost always leaves the grocery shopping to me. Which is totally fine because I actually like doing it. However he often tells me not to buy a bunch of "crap" food such as chips and random junk food but when I don't he complains that there is nothing "easy" in the house to eat. He will eat fruit if I buy it but not as snack food only to pack for lunches and it often spoils before it all gets eaten. So I wonder what is something snacks-ish that I can but that he will actually want to snack on? The man sometimes is like a hoover almost every time he walks into his moms he instantly walks to the kitchen and grabs a handful of chips and a little debbie brownie. How can I keep food in the house that he wants to eat but will not inhale within 2 days of me going grocery shopping. Any suggestions would be appreciated!!

Monday, September 20, 2010

TV Cooking

Happy Monday AOP followers! I have a confession, I sometimes think I am an expert baker/cooker. I am not though, I try I get these ideas in my head that I CAN make that perfect cake in the magazine or really make a great Italian dinner just like Giada does. But alas I cannot usually. Something just doesn't work out like its suppose to. For example I decided it would be a great idea to try to make cake pops. I bought a book, I ready the troubleshooting, I gathered most of the necessary supplies. (I could not find lollipop sticks at Walmart so I made cake balls) So I get home and begin the process of making cake balls. These sound easy enough; bake a cake, crumble it up, mix with frosting, roll into balls and cover with candy coating. All goes well until I get to the candy coating. Its suppose to be simple its just suppose to be a dip and roll and smooth perfect cake coating. Well what I got was think hard to manage bumpy candy coating. While the mmm mmm good taste was there but the perfect flawless little pumpkin that I was trying to make just was not. I will be trying again just I need some tints how to thin my candy coating because I think that was my main problem.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

I think it's happening... I'm turning into a BRIDEZILLA

HELP!!!! I need help I don't know how to stop the monster it's taking over me and I need to know how to stop the transformation and reverse the damage that has been done. What is a girl to do when a monster takes over her body? Should I go see a doctor? "Hi I need to see the doctor as soon as possible I monster has taken over my soul, yes I can hold." Or a priest? "Hello father, can you schedule  me in for an exorcism sometimes on Saturday between 10 and 2 I have a wedding at 6 that I have to get ready for?" Are these acceptable phone calls to make? Would they then hang up and call the loony bin to come get me? Does the loony bin pick up? Is it wrong that I find it a welcome incarceration. Sit in a white room alone to relax. I would miss Bay and Brandon though and my family but maybe just a couple days a week instead of going to work I could go to the loony bin sit alone in a room and just relax. So please to anyone out there who is a high strung natural nut case please tell me how to not freak out on unsuspecting bystanders?

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The Pia Show....

So to quote Kanye "I forgot better shit then you ever thought of.." Sometimes I feel like that. I know this will probably sound so bad but I have such a mean thought process sometimes and I really have to watch what I say when I  am with certain people. However this weekend I had the chance to hang out with my very sweet friend Sam, while with I can usually say whatever I want when I am with her because she knows I don't mean things in a hurtful way I just call them like I see them. To this she exclaims excitedly you need your own TV show. How would my TV show go? Would I just go out and meet people and then report back to the camera on how I really felt. Or would I have people come to me with relatives or friends to tell them what assholes they are being because they are too scared to tell them themselves? I have a feeling a lot of people really wouldn't like me. But then again I don't really care. (This is the result of have a very great, fantastic, & amazing group of friends) My mom use to tell me that I could cut steel with my tongue, maybe that could somehow be worked into the title of new hit show. I wonder what network my show would broadcast on? Would you watch it?

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Disappointment

Hello bloggers I hope everyone had a great Labor Day! I absolutely did! We got Baylee's swing set put up and by we I mean Brandon, went to the zoo, and watched a few DVD's. Today's blog however is about disappointment and how much I hate it! I can usually protect myself from disappointment from others because I don't put trust in people that don't deserve it. That being said I cannot protect those that I love from being disappointed because it is up to them who the trust and put faith in. It drives me up the wall when I feel like someone has not put my family or friends in the proper priority level. I think the problem is that I expect from others what I would do or give. I know that's bad and I shouldn't feel that way but I do. Its not me that I expect it for I think that would be selfish but for those that I love I just want the best! Is that asking too much?

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

For the love of chicken

So Brandon is all about me making him chicken however he gets very bored with me making the same dishes all the time. This leaves us at a catch 22 because I only have time to make things that are quick because I am at work till 7:15 and he wants things that take a long time to make. Whats a girl to do? I tried looking for some good crock pot recipes but many of them require a lot of preparation before the meat even gets to the pot and to me that defeats the whole purpose. So what does this girl do I call my pa pa because he makes this amazing stewed chicken that just falls right off the bone and absorbs all this amazing flavor it is amazing!! (Almost makes me want to give up being a vegetarian) I am hoping I can load all the ingredients up in a crock pot and make the deliciousness for Brandon. Now my pa pa usually served this over polenta because he is a traditional Italian but I am thinking I may do something a little different like egg noodles or even rice. So I am asking you bloggers for any additional ideas you may have to spice up chicken in a fast easy way!!

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Controlling your kids..

Can I just begin by saying that if you have a child who is over 8 and you have to yell at them to stay with you and not get into trouble then you have probably done something wrong. I am not saying that all children always behave properly but there are those repeated offenders. There just needs to be some point where you are able to go out to the store or a restaurant without them terrorizing the whole place and being completely destructive. Tell your kids no and reinforce it. You cannot just say no and then ignore what they are doing. Yes, YOU don’t have to clean up the mess but do you really want to be that person and everyone to not want to be around your kids? I know I personally love when people tell me how well behaved my daughter is being. Is she always like this? No. But when she isn’t we handle it immediately so we don’t create a disturbance or be rude. So please for the love of everything holy control your child and understand that it is not cute for them to trash things that don’t belong to them or you!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Katy Perry.. This is how I feel

So Katy Perry... I have to say I just don't get the mass appeal. I just don’t think she has any talent other then saying what she thinks people want to hear in her poorly performed song. Plus I have a deep hatred of people who fill parts of their songs with lalalalals because they cant think of lyrics to go fill in the chorus. I feel like Katy Perry is the stereotypical popular high school girl.



1. She is pretty; she has a good body and a decent rack.


2. She alludes to being bi-sexual which I fear is just a ploy to make men interested in. (Typical HS move!)


3. She is in highly public relationships back to back.


4. She makes statements about other people who are popular to try and draw attention back to herself.


I just don’t get it. I will admit her songs do occasionally get stuck in my head but so does the Dora the explorer song, hell anything that repeats itself. I just don’t understand the appeal of that type of person, maybe I am getting to old, maybe its because I was never in a "click" in high school and often steered away from the "popular" people. I just don’t like the ultra manipulative ways of people with really strong personalities I guess. So to those who LOVE LOVE LOVE Katy Perry I say listen to some real music. If you need suggestions let me know.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

I am in love....

So I am in deep and undying lover.... with a pair of shoes. They are magnificent and I would marry them if I could but I don’t think that is legal so I just plan on getting married in them. That is logical right? Here are the amazing little devils that have stolen my heart.

They are all sparkles and shimmers and even better I can wear them again and again and again and again. Hell I may wear them everyday until they fall apart or I die. I mean really how could any living person not be 100% head over heels in love with these? I want them. I need them. I must have them. Some may say that they are a bit over the top but if they knew me they would know they are perfect, so now all to do is order them and find a way to convince myself not to wear them before October. I mean really is there anything in the world that these shoes would not go with that I would actually wear? Nope. Will I be able to wear them out to dinner or out to a show? Yep! Sold I will be buying these bad bitches very very soon!!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

When are you a grown up?

Happy Tuesday bloggers, I have been thinking a lot about reasons people are the way they are lately. This is what I have come up with that some people never truly grow up. They never take responsibility for their actions, they never own up to mistakes that they made, they always and forever remain children. This realization came hand in hand with the realization that these are also the people who blame their childhood for the way that their life has turned out. I do not understand how the fact that your mommy held you too much relates to the fact that you can't pay your bills on time. Why does society allow these children in adult bodies to continue using upbringing as an excuse to justify poor behavior? In my opinion there has to be some point where you say yes I have been through some shit in my past but I am better then that and I am not going to let that define me. So to all those people out there feeling sorry for people who had a bad childhood I have a question for you, would you feel sorry for me if I told you that I should be rich because I had a winning lottery ticket 10 years ago and that’s why I spend more then I make and never have any money? I'm just saying...

Monday, August 2, 2010

Showered in love!

Happy Monday bloggers! Yesterday afternoon I was showered in love at my wedding shower. The group was small but it was all love when me, my family and a few close friends gathered for lunch and punch. I received some really amazing gifts and was really touched how generous my loved ones can be. We were so luck to receive everything we needed and a lot of stuff that we just wanted. :) I started thinking how did the bridal shower tradition begin? It seems so logical that it should have always been but their is always a story and I thought I would share one with you that I found and thought was cute. It begins with a woman from a wealthy family falling in love with a poor man. Her father disapproved so he refused to give them her dowry so they could not afford to buy the thing they needed. So his family and friends all gave some small things to help the couple get started. I love stories with happy endings and that was certainly one! Hope everyone enjoys their week!

Thursday, July 29, 2010

I want my birthday!!

HELLO BLOGGERS! Sorry I have been absent for a few days I just haven’t had the itch to blog about anything fun lately. Today though it occurred to me that my birthday is 5 days away!! I am excited as much as i try not to be excited (because what almost 30 year old still gets excited for their birthday) I do! I love having birthday cake with my family, I love the surprise of opening presents, I love the whole day being about me. I know that sounds horrible but I am a kid at heart what can I say. I think nowadays so many people just feel like their birthday is just another day nothing special to celebrate, but that is not the case! People around you should join together to rejoice that you are in their lives and we should all do the same for those we love! As we get older all "celebrations" seem to loose the excitement but with my birthday approaching so fast I wanted to tell everyone not to let these moments pass, act like a kid, tear the paper off your gift, blow out your candles and CELEBRATE that you are here!!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Micro-management

Dear world I have a confession... I try to be good I try not to "hate" but I do with a deep burning passion hate people who try to micro-manage me. So here is my hate mail to all the micro-managers out there. :)
Dear Micro-Manager,
I am a 28 year old woman who is usually pretty quick at catching on and I am not afraid to ask you for help so if I need it I will come to you. Please do not tell me 15 ways you would have done something differently to achieve the same result. I do not care. Please do not stand over me watching what I am doing in a disapproving way dying to jump in and ask me to do it different way. If you want to do it then say so and I will either concede or simply say no and do it myself. Some people say this is team work, however teams give on each side and are there for the whole thing not to just come in and ask you to do it their way and then leave. Please trust that I am not a fucking moron that is going to totally butcher everything that touch, especially things that I have been doing for a long time with much success. I will admit Micro-Manager that I sometimes have a odd way about going about things but differences are what make the world go round. Please DO NOT feel free to continue this un-welcome behavior I got it covered!
Yours Truly
Pia

Monday, July 26, 2010

RSVP?

Hello bloggers this weekend is my wedding shower and we are having a sit down lunch at a restaurant and I am so excited. However this does raise the RSVP problem. Do you assume that people who do not RSVP are not coming? Do you call and text people to see if they are coming? (This seems rude to me personally) Do you just guess who you think will be there and hope you guess right? I have no clue. I don’t know the correct etiquette when it comes to showers and wedding, I have never been married before. They should make a book of what to do when you get married what is allowed what is proper and every woman over 18 should have to read it. Even if you never plan on getting married then you also understand why it is so important to RSVP and what these crazy brides are going through. When I was younger I never understood why I needed to RSVP, I would just say if I am not working I will be there. If someone told me that now I would want to bitch slap them. How young and naive I was. I truly just didn’t understand the big deal until I had to plan something myself and deal with all this! So word to the naive out there RSVP-ing is very very important!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Ways to be a better person

As many of you know I am not a very good person but I am trying to better myself so I found an article that gives a simple set of 10 rules to be a better person.
1. Say please and thank you
2. Be courteous
3. Be courteous
4. Work with others
5. Smile
6. Say I'm sorry
7. Be honest
8. Listen
9. Be Complimentry
10. Laugh
These all seem pretty simple but if we all followed these as much as possible the world would be so much better. I mean how hard is it to say thank you or smile and it just makes yours and others days so much better. Its the same principle as "paying it forward." You do have to be open to it though you cannot just coast through life not noticing the small things people do. I suggest trying these small things for a week and see how much better you feel. I will post in a week and let you all know how its working for me!!

Monday, July 19, 2010

Holiday Acres.. Heaven on earth!

This week I am blogging from northern Wisconsin. It is amazing up here and it makes me wonder why everywhere isnt like this. Dont get me wrong I appreciate the hustle and bustle of city life but for me this would be heaven and I would vacation in the city. Life is a little slower and its just beautiful here. There is just a differant feel here. People are not at all pretentious, you get the feeling that no one locks the doors, people leave thier clothes hanging up outside on the line just trusting no one would take them. Not to mention there are trees and wildlife all around, last night while driving by wonderful daughter around at 3:30am because she woke up I saw deer, a skunk, a fox and these are all normal things. One year we were lucky enough to see bears there is a different balance. I hope that in 20 years when we come up here with Baylee still she will appreaciate the way of life here and that it will still be the same here. So to those out there who come across this blog and have never experianced the northwoods and thier beauty next time yo plan a trip come on up to Holiday Acres and see what you have been missing!!

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Wedding Colors

As many of you know I am planning the most amazing wedding that will ever take place. JK. But any who I feel the need to express my hatred for certain wedding colors. These are those colors that you see take over high school proms, pageants, or little girls clothing. A wedding is a celebration but it should also be done with at least some class and elegance. These are on the list on unacceptable colors according to PIA: Hot Pink, Turquoise, Lime Green, all Black, or Orange. If you start to think of using any of these colors please stop and reconsider. Do you really want to be the trashy bride who makes her bridesmaids look like they should be in a prom catalogue? If they are the ones who are pushing this color tell them they can use it for their wedding because you are not trashy and they should already know this. These are the words I have to say heed them!

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

The sensitive man... Is this what we really want?

Hello blog world I have been wondering about something. We all see these sensitive men the "Adian's" I call them. Sweet and loving and they have feelings and want to hold your hand and run their fingers through your hair and tell you how beautiful you are. But is this really what we want women? Do you want a man who takes longer to get ready then you and wants to tell you how HE feels when you come home late? I sure as hell don’t! I want a man that will take out the garbage, mow the grass, all while keeping his feeling to himself. I don’t mean to be unkind and maybe its because of the way that I was raised but I have enough of my own feelings to wade through in this life I don’t want to have to deal with yours too. I don’t want to hear you cry about the small fight we got in. Apologize like a man in a sincere way and it will go much further then crying like a baby because that I will just walk away from and really be annoyed on the inside that you cried. When being a man you should always remember that you have balls and act accordingly so here are some rules to guide you:
1. No crying unless your child or direct family member dies. (Or maybe you DOG)
2. Garbage is your job no matter what.
3. Grass care and knowledge is yours… don't ask me to touch it.
4. If wife or girlfriend is scared of bugs you kill them or relocate if you are with me.
5. You must know how to drive a stick.
6. You are not allowed to be scared of snakes or creepy things like that.
7. You should have strong knowledge or automotive workings.
These are just a few basics I reserve the right to add at anytime. 

Monday, July 12, 2010

The end is the end.. lets keep it that way!

Two in one day I know but the beauty next to me inspired this one. I am a firm believer that once a relationship is over it is done no being friends, no keeping in contact, it is done. I know this is unrealistic if kids are involved between the two people but other then that cut that cord when it ends. I have long told friends that you do not stay in touch with family or friends of the dreaded ex. I do not care how close you are or how long you two have been together how much you love his mom they are now dead to you. Yes it hurts yes it is hard but it is the end of that chapter and you cannot expect yourself to move forward if you are still holding on to the past. When you stay in touch you keep the lines of communication open and I’m my experience that is never a good sign. What do doctors always say on TV don’t worry it was a clean break.. thats what a relationship is a break and if you cant trust me the take your favorite TV doctors advise and let it be a clean one!

Fun minus the drama PLEASE!

Sorry it has been so long I had the stomach flu and it was very unkind to me. I did have a fantastic weekend though with of course a little drama. Brandon and I went to the sox game Saturday!! (Of course we won!) However we hit a little speed of drama at the end of the night and I just do not see why this is not avoidable. I understand that when people drink they are more likely to misunderstand things and also more likely to say something that they normally wouldn’t say all this I accept. What really makes me crazy though is when other people feel the need to but into a couples or two friend’s disagreement and use this time to voice their heart felt concerns about said relationship. Really? This is the best time to tell someone you don’t like their significant other? I don't think so, do what any sane person would do and look the other way and sip your drink. It is none of your business unless someone say hey Pia what do you think of this situation I keep my onions to myself (or blog) end of story. This happening on Saturday made a small argument into a huge one and it was totally unnecessary. So for the love of everything holy if someone isn’t getting hit or verbally abused just stay the fuck out of it no one asked for your opinion so keep out of it.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Wedding planner wanted!

Position Wanted:
Wedding planner

Qualifications:
Ideal candidate will have planned at least 2 weddings before that went off without a hitch. Must have pictures and references of said events available for me to review.

Pay Scale:
I am willing to pay a whopping $20 to planner for time and effort!

Job Description:
Must take care of all things that I do not want to do myself and anticipate these things before I even know it must be done so I do not have to stress about it. You must always have everything done early and in a complete manner. I will also need you to set up the little things in the dining room before the wedding begins.

If you are interested in applying for this amazing opportunity please post resume to my blog! Thanks bunches ~Pia

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Eclipse!!

Good Tuesday bloggers I have a much happier note today to write about and it is my excitement over Eclipse. I will admit that I am a Fanatic when it comes to the Twilight movies and books. I just started reading them right before the first movie was released because I am a firm believer that the book is always better then the movie. But As far as Twilight is concerned I know many people believe me to be a late comer and only interested because of the hoopla that Hollywood has created. I am not that person though! I love all the characters so much and I feel like I am some lucky prop in the Cullen world. I almost stopped reading the books after Eclipse because I was so heart broken for Jacob I didn’t think I could make it though another devastating round of his heart break. I vividly remember lying on my couch reading the end of Eclipse and crying so hard I couldn’t even read anymore. (To this Brandon rolled his eyes and went to bed) I do not own any tee-shirts because I am after all almost 30 and at what point does a 28 year old woman look even remotely right in a tee shirt from the tween section? Never. I am going to see Eclipse tonight at midnight by myself and I am so freaking excited I could just burst I know its going to be amazing. So my dear blog readers have you lost all respect for me yet??

Sunday, June 27, 2010

I fucking hate people!

Sorry ahead of time if you don't like this blog but I do fucking hate people. People are mean and inconsiderate and think of themselves first. I get it survival of the fittest. The only question then is where does that leave relationships and love and family? Are they suppose to be the ones who care about you and always have you back? Or are they the ones who the stabbing you in the back when you think they are protecting your backside? I don't know anymore. I feel like all I want to do is be alone and not have anyone around me because then I know I cant get hurt. I don't disappoint myself, I don't put myself before others, I don't say that something is important and then throw it away like garbage. I don't do that. Plus why have those moments of happiness just to have them come back and bite you in the ass and make your whole life feel like a lie. Like you were the stupid ass that everyone knows is getting fucked and you just walk around with a big stupid fucking grin on your face! I am done with the grin I am done with the lies I am done looking and hoping for the best in people. So this is me signing off jaded as hell and okay with it!!

Friday, June 25, 2010

Big brother is watching, and by big brother I mean me!

Happy Friday!!! Has anyone out there ever caught themselves staring at someone just watching them? Well I very frequently do. I love to watch people and I get so focused on doing so that forget to look away once in a while so I don’t look like a creeper. Some people are just so fun to watch, I love watching people who are fighting and doing it quietly so others don’t know they are arguing. People with their children are always funny because if you are close enough to hear them they always some of the dumbest shit to keep their kids from being crazy and they usually listen. Suckers! I especially love watching people when they think they are getting away with something naughty. They get this look on their face like I am fucking the man right now and no one is even noticing. HAHAH I am! It’s just so much fun to stop and see things that other people miss. We are all loving some reality show or another right now and if we just took a minute to watch what was going around us we would have our own reality right in front of us. What better entertainment can you think of then people acting like complete asses right in front of you and not even noticing that you are watching them so they just keep going. So ladies and gentlemen I urge you to take part with me and just sit back and enjoy the show.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

I WANT TO LIVE IN ATLANTIS!!

Good afternoon my bloggers last night while out with the girls and admittedly a little tipsy I devised a quite simple plan to live in the lost city of Atlantis. It would be perfect for me I could live in seclusion which I love! I would always be in water another deep love of mine. (So much so I sometimes just fill up the bathtub and float facedown for as long as I can just imagining I am a fish) Finally I would live a beautiful city made of gold and surrounded by fish and ocean life it would be amazing. So here is the plan: First I will become a vampire that way I no longer have to breathe. Next I will turn my family because obviously they will be coming with me. Then I will move to the ocean and search for Atlantis until I find it living on sharks and such (being a vegetarian vampire). Once I find Atlantis I will make the necessary repairs because it has of course been lost for many years so it will probably need some updating. Then I will retrieve my family and live out the rest of eternity surrounded by the water and the wonderful sea life. It would be amazing!! Now I just have to get BP to fix their fuck up so the ocean is still beautiful by the time I find a vampire to change me.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Older siblings... The rules

Hi blog followers I was chatting on facebook with my cousin and we were talking about our "perfect" older siblings. She has an older brother and I an older sister and they are both a hard act to follow if you catch my drift. Good grades? Check. Nice friends? Check. Do gooders? Check. Now I am not saying that my cousin and myself where hell on wheels but we did find our fair share of trouble to get into. So I decided to come up with a few rules for older sibling to abide by that way the ones following have it easier.
1. Do not get straight A's, it makes it impossible for those following to compete with that. Especially sense we all know that mom had extra time with you to teach you stuff because you were the first.
2. Break some of the rules now and then. Really its ok to come in late now and then. get caught smoking a cigarette. It will make my life so much easier.
3. Have at least 2 friends that the 'rents disapprove of. Because I sure as hell will and I don't like getting the eyes from them.
4. Have a messy room and "forget" about doing the dishes so when I do i don't get the well your sister/brother always did that without me telling them.
5. Have at least one boyfriend/girlfriend with a tattoo or abnormal piercing so when I bring home my boyfriend that has a full sleeve I don't have to hear dad lecture about how he will never be able to support a family looking like a freak.
So big sisters and brothers these are the rules, you must obey. This is the price for always getting the new toys, clothes, and basically being the favorite. Thanks for your compliance!!

Monday, June 21, 2010

Me no speaka english

Happy Monday Bloggers! I am so freaking annoyed with people who cannot speak English. No I am not speaking about people who are vacationing or fresh off the boat but those who live and work here! Seriously why the hell would you not want to be able to communicate with the outside world? If I was going to a foreign country even for vacation I would learn at least a little of the language. But to live and work somewhere and not speak the language is completely unacceptable. Do not expect me to bend over backwards to try to understand you when you have been living here most if not all your life and you have chosen to stay ignorant about the simplest means of communication. I am not trying to offend anyone to be offensive but it is completely true. When you think about back in the 20's and 30's when people were migrating to the States and we really became a melting pot of culture all those people assimilated and became part of the American culture. Its is nice to know where you come from but it is more important to know where you are going and if the means staying in America then get on the wagon and learn to speak freaking English OK?

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

When you gotta go...

Today we are going to talk about bathrooms and Pia's do's and don’ts.
1. No matter how many time you have to flush you keep flushing till everything is gone! Period everything!
2. If at all possible avoid and sounds of relief that can be heard by others. No one needs to hear your “ahhs” or “O Lords” keep it to yourself.
3. For the sake of everything holy make sure the seat is clean before you leave. I personally do not understand how women get pee on the seat but if it does happen wipe it off.
4. Along with number 3 make sure there are no hairs from down there lingering. I mean if your bush is so out of control that you are shedding every time you sit there are other issues but at least make sure you are not leaving someone else to deal with your pubes.
5. If your child is accompanying you in the restroom it is your job as a parent to make sure they stay in your stall. Hands feet heads all parts are your responsibility because no one like to see parts of someone else in their space.
6. If in a public restroom with a friend please avoid having detailed personal conversations through the door. I don't want to hear about it.
7. Let someone know if the toilet paper is out. It takes two freaking seconds pay it forward people!
8. Make sure if there are wrappers being opened they end up in garbage. I don't care if it’s in the stall or the bathroom just get them in the trash.
9. If you must brush you hair in the public bathroom don’t leave your little bits of hair all over and in the sink. Its gross I don't know why but it is so clean it up.
Follow these and we will all be much happier!!

Sunday, June 13, 2010

In my day!

Happy Sunday to my blog world. I was thinking about trying to get some playtime together with some other kids for Baylee because I am concerned that she doesn’t like playing with other kids. She prefers to only play with adults. Yes she is just two and for now an only child but I don't want her to be that kid in kindergarten who doesn’t know how to socialize with other kids. Anyway back to the matter at hand I was think how old would Baylee have to be before I would feel comfortable letting her walk to a friends house, or meet at the playground alone, hell even meet a friend at the mall? I watch SVU I know what can happen and I frequently check the sex offenders registry so I can memorize those sickos faces and make sure there is no-one hanging around my house. I am a paranoid parent fine. I was raised however to walk to my friends house to play, I would go in the woods and disappear for hours and hours just playing or walking around with a friend all when I was in grade school. If Baylee disappeared for hours in 3rd grade I think I would have a panic attack. I do not however want to scare her so much from the world that she is afraid to enjoy it because those were some of my favorite times growing up. So I am somewhere lost in the middle and I need guidance when is okay to let them out? How do I know that she will come home safe? How the hell did my mom do it with 4 of us... I guess things were just different in my day!

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Facebook: Friend or Foe?

Good morning bloggers last night I was laying in bed thinking about facebook. Is facebook really worth it?? Yes all of the people who are on facebook are at least slightly narcissistic why else would we feel the need to keep everyone we know updated on our daily happening. But that aside do you think facebook is really a positive attribute to today’s society? If you think about it logically you are spending so much time online posting and reading and looking at people’s pictures when you could be out or on the phone with a true friend strengthening your relationship. My very best friend has trouble with facebook because she treats it like her everyday life; if she receives a friend request from someone she is not friends with (real friends outside of the world wide web) then she ignores or declines. One of the many reasons I love her so much she is a real friend through and through if I need her she is there and with or with out the WWW I know that we will always be there for each other. On another note I often feel that I have to edit what I am saying on facebook which totally defeats the purpose of posting what’s going on in your life. I feel like I need more defined options then just friend. Here are a few ideas that I have for "friend" classifications: overly friendly clients who stalk you online, bosses who you don’t want to see that your going to the zoo when you called off sick, family members who should know nothing about sex, drinking, or partying, odd high school friend who thinks that you 2 are BFF's, you get my point. But while doing all this editing in my head I feel like I then loose my voice and being dishonest because I am just putting up these vanilla posts that are void of any real interest which leads me back to where is the point. So I am turning to you bloggers what’s the answer facebook: friend or foe?

Friday, June 11, 2010

AM I THE INVISABLE WOMAN?

Happy Friday bloggers hope everyone is busy making plans to have a great weekend! Today I was contemplating on whether or not I am invisible. Some times I think I am! I am often stepped on (yes literally stepped on) by co-workers and Brandon and friends because they do not notice me there. I am not a graceful person I am always tripping I walk very hard yet people do not notice me there. I don’t get it! So sometimes I think to myself should I wear flashing lights should I put a beeper on me so that people can hear when I move? I am unclear how it is people miss me I am not small, I am not graceful, I do not make sudden movements like a skidish cat, so the only possibility left is that I must be invisible. I wonder then if I could rob a bank without anyone noticing. Maybe I will start small a candy bar to see how my powers work. I wonder if I could become a super hero? I probably shouldn’t steal if I am a super hero. O well maybe I will just be the girl version of Clark Kent and lead a boring life and just know that I could do anything because I am invisible... Well bloggers see you later...maybe??

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

What makes a happy marriage?

Dear bloggers as some of you may know I am getting married in October. I am so looking forward to the big day but with the divorce rate it is these days and many of my friends and family divorced or unhappily married I cant help but wonder how we will make it work. I love my fiance and I know that we are both willing to fight the fights that needs to be faught and we are both getting to a place where we know to choose our battles but the number is still there 40 to 50% of american marriages end in divorce. How aweful is it to think that wont be us? Who will it be? One of our friends? I dont know one of our friends (who is in no rush to get married) even said dont worry I will get married when you are all on your second round of marriages. While some may think that is a harsh anaolgy it is also probably true. While some people fall victim to cheaters, others just the stress of everyday life tearing them apart, what is the defining facor? At my job we have a wonderful man who is in his 90's and speaks so highly of his wife of 70 some odd years saying that she is the best woman ever and they have had so little time together and he is so lucky. I want that he me and for Brandon and for Baylee! So people out there if you know the secret please let me in on it!! Thanks bunches Pia.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Consider Considering...

Dear World,
If you could all join me in taking a second to consider how what you do effect others we could all co-exist much more peacefully. Think about it every time you make a decision you affect others either directly or indirectly! When you speed past someone and cut them off you assume that you and what you are doing is more important then them, when you are late and keep someone waiting you then throw their whole daily schedule off and make them feel rushed and anxious. It would be so much easier if you just came out and said no I can’t make it for another 15 minutes they can plan their day accordingly. Simple things can make others lives so much more easy and yours too. I am not going to pretend that I always do this but I will say that I try to when someone speeds past me I just think well maybe they are running late. But then I get infuriated when someone pulls out in front of me and fails to hit the gas pedal. So like I said I am not perfect but if we all would consider others and how our actions affect them we could live in a much more peaceful loving place. So please just remember all to consider considering others in our daily actions!
Love
~Pia

Friday, June 4, 2010

I HATE OLD PEOPLE!

I know it’s not nice to make generalizations but I really do not like a very large amount of old people. Also I did say in my very first blog that I often will put my foot in my mouth so if you are one of the old people I love just know this does not apply to you! Now on with the rant, why is it that all freaking old people expect me to be able to read their minds, fill out all of their paperwork, understand what they mean when the cant even verbalize what they want? Am I an asshole because I do not want to bend over backwards for someone who treats me like I am just some young "punk" that should move hell and earth to give them what they need? No I am not; I am just a 27 year old woman who does not need to bend of to please anyone especially a freaking stranger who is too lazy to take care of their own business. I don’t care if you forgot your bifocals, I don’t care if you had to stand in line for 3 minutes while I helped someone else, I don’t care if you use to do things this way, if I wanted your advice on a subject I would ask. So to all the old biddies of the world listen up I DO NOT NOT NOT CARE WHAT YOU WANT, THINK, OR DO! Just get your shit ready come do your business and don’t expect special treatment just because you are old.
Thanks Bunches
~Pia

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

from babes mouths!

Good evening bloggers as a made it through today by just a hair I lay am laying in bed and thinking about all the silly things my girls say ( my 2 nieces and my daughter, all under 3). So in the immortal words of Carrie Bradshaw I could help but wonder... where do they get this. Marlee, ofen the ring leader of the girls, told GaGa that she could not play on the porch today because Roberto was out there. We no one named anything close to roberto and there is no character on TV that she watches with this name. Then later Baylee, my Zeena warrior princess, tells me that she has to poop. well sitting on the pot she gives a little push and says oooo mommy its heavy. It took everything in my not to die of laughter right there. How is it that before children can even express complete thoughts they say some of the funnies shit ever uttered? Seriously I just dont get it! So here is to the Roberto's and heavy poo poos you will always bring a smile to my face!!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Hello? Hello? Hello?

Is anyone there? I cannot emphasize how much I hate it when people talk on their damn phones when at a check out counter. Seriously hang the fucker up!! Not only are you being rude to the person in front of you but you are also being a total ass to all the people behind you that have to wait longer because you think your so freaking important! Honestly if it is an emergency get out of line and take the call otherwise hang up the fucking phone. No one wants to hear you personal business, who you slept with, what kind of blisters you have, who your boyfriend cheated on you with, I don't care and I don’t want to hear about it. Don’t pull the if you don’t want to hear then don’t listen either because I cannot turn off my ears they work when I want them to and when I don’t. So please people for the love of GOD hang up the damn phone...NOW :)

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

money money money MON EY

Good afternoon bloggers I just wanted to share with you that I received a letter in the mail today to explain my social security benefits. This letter stated that if I needed to collect disability today then I would be able to collect $906 a month plus have free health care.. for real? I am currently making a little more then that each month however I do have to go to work and use up all my time and miss seeing my daughter grow up. This just seems crazy to me and I have a sneaking suspicion that this is why there are so many freaking people collecting disability that have self inflicted problems that they have no desire to get help for and they are just milking the system it makes me so mad. If you became an addict that is your fault I understand that you may need help getting though it but I don’t see that it is my responsibility to care for your problems. I am not saying that I want to collect SSI because I do not feel that I have paid my dues and I really don’t deserve it I can work and i can struggle and I can do what needs to be done to get by but I do not appreciate all those assholes who do not have my work ethic or a work ethic at all that are sitting back collecting the money that I am putting in for me!

Saturday, May 22, 2010

WTF????

Hello bog world I went to lunch with my BFF today and found the inspiration for today’s post! As we were sitting eating chips and salsa two maybe 12 years olds walked past us wearing shorts that cover less then my underwear. Their mom walked out behind them and I almost got up and bitched slapped her. Really you let your daughters leave the house dressed like that? Fine you have 2 beautiful daughters that does not mean that you should let them walk around dressed like sluts. (unless you want them to be sluts) Fine I understand that when they get older they can wear what they want but at this young age why wouldn’t you want to encourage them to dress more appropriately. With all the perverts in the world I know that I would not want to draw their attention to my daughter. Children these days have so little time to be children and when we start dressing them in coochie cutters when they are infants, five, eight, even twelve do you really think that you are allowing them to be kids? The only reason for shorts that short and tight is to attract sexual attention and there is no fucking reason anyone in those age groups should be wearing shorts that short!
So bloggers I leave you on this note: If you have to shave your bikini line to wear shorts or would have to if your daughter is too young to shave maybe those shorts should not be for her. This is how Sue C's it!!!

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Night Night Baby

My darling daughter is amazing! She is smart, funny, beautiful perfect is just about everyway. My D.D will not sleep at night and she is driving me to the brink of insanity! She is over 2 years old and will just crawl out of bed and come in my room and ask for milk, to go play blocks, to read a story book, to turn on oomie zoomie and I do not know how to stop this. I have tried just bringing her back to bed and she cries and cries. I am willing to give her milk but usually that is not enough, I was under the impression that by this time we would be done with this shit. Mommy likes to sleep, I could sleep probably 2 days straight and be just fine but now I am lucky if I get 4 or 5 hours in a row. Also I feel like a horrible parent for letting her cry it out when I am not sleeping I am just sitting in bed listening to her cry. What the hell am I suppose to do? Any suggestions please feel free to lay them on me!!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Tail Anyone?

Hello Bloggers I have recently decided that I want a tail. Let me explain... I would like a monkey tail minus the hair! I think it would be fun to have a tail! I could catch myself if I was falling I could hang from things, I could hit people without being too close to them. Then I could walk around normal at work because I could just put it down one of my pant legs. Also I could catch Baylee (my D.D.) if she tries to run away. I could catch things that I might drop. I could be a super fast swimmer because I would have like an extra leg pushing me along. I wonder if I could join the Olympics with a tail, what you think. It would be perfect, I can see it now me and my tail winning a gold medal!

Sunday, May 16, 2010

You LINT LICKER

So world as we all know I love to curse! I really do I don’t know if its the taboo of it or that I just like the words. (For instance I like to use the word plethora in a plethora of ways) It is true though I like to cuss! Now for the real boom my favorite curse word is good old C-U-Next-Tuesday! I don’t find it offensive or mean I just use it in conversation like I would use any other adjective out there. I personally find it very offensive when people tell me to watch my mouth or not to say this or other "curse words." I am not cursing anyone I am just speaking. There are a lot of words that people use everyday that have bad, dirty, or negative connotations but most people still use them. Like the word moist or vagina these words can be used in a nasty way but really they are just words that people use. So I sign off today on this note: fuck shit cock damn bitch ass cunt dick douche crap.

Friday, May 14, 2010

MEN! WTF????

Good Morning Bloggers Pia just needs a moment to vent! About what you may ask, what most women bitch about men. I am not an overly attractive woman and I do not flirt nor am I a chatty person by nature yet in a normal day I have a 2-3 men who I know are in relationships who flirt or hit on me. SERIOUSLY? I see you come in with your wife or significant other yet when you are alone I magically forget that you have someone. I think not! I am not that kind of person I do not cheat and I would never encourage someone else to cheat. I have a ring on this finger because I love someone and apparently he liked it so much he put a ring on it so back up. Be nice, be cordial but don’t flirt with me. Not to be a bitch but even if I was single I wouldn’t be interested! So please men before you feel the need to make feeble attempt at being interesting stop and ask yourself are you really interesting? Probably not!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

O Baby Just You Shut Your Mouth!

Hello Bloggers do you know what really grinds my gears? People who have rotting nasty breath! I mean this is basic hygiene here people! When You get up or after you have your coffee at the very last before you leave your house stop and take a minute and brush your gosh damn teeth! I have the PRIVILEGE of working with the public and I am sooooo tired of people coming in with their breath smelling like a rotting corpse. They make a plethora of products to cover or fix this problem yet day after day I to beg a co-worker to spray me in the face with febreeze so I can breath without gagging. So I leave you on this note... O baby just you shut your mouth!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

My Wonderful Mother

Good morning blog followers I wanted to talk about my mother for a moment today because to know her is to understand me that much more! My mother is a beautiful woman inside and out. She is the kind of mother most people wish they had and I have been fortunate enough most of my life to realize this and appreciate it. I am not saying she has not make a mistake or two. Everyone has but they were her mistakes with me she was always perfect. She was there when I needed her, stayed away when I needed the space, and knew the difference between the two without me telling her. She never laughed or made fun of me for awful fashion choices or random Jr/Sr high school actions that were questionable to say the least. My amazing mother always encouraged me to follow my dreams and did whatever she could to get me where I wanted to be. I hear many people talk about what makes a good mother and I just have to start rattling off minor details about my amazing mom and everyone is instantly jealous. Plus she shares a deep appreciation for nieman marcus shoe adds (they are after all art). What can I say I have the BEST BEST BEST BEST mom!!!!!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Happy Birthday??

Hello all! Over the past few days my darling daughter has taken up saying "Happy Birthday" when ever she desides to unglue herself from the TV and notice me. This got me thinking that maybe we should have more then one birthday! Why not right? Lets think about this logically, presents more then once a year, cake and singing more then once a year, and a celebration of you being alive more then once a year. I propose we have a birthday every quarter of a year. I think that would suffice. What do we think is anyone else with me?
So its 9:05 and I have already been peed on in my sleep (odd that my name is Pia and I have been peed on...I think not), had poop fall on my hand because I couldnt get Baylee on the potty fast enough for her and has to shampoo the sofa cushion again because someone peed out of her diaper! Awesome way to start a miserable weather day!!
But on the bright side I am getting all my laundry done even if it kills me and probably will go visit my mama and make spicy chicken pasta for Danny and Brandon.
Randon H.H. fact for the day: He loved peas and even had a special spoon to sort them by size.

Monday, May 10, 2010

So I have developed a recent facination with Howard Hughes. Not really how he made all his money but more how crazy he was. I dont know why but I am really fasinated with his OCD. I think I am going to go buy his biography so I can read more about him. I think that if Brandon was anyone else he would find it odd that while lying in bed about to fall asleep I was rattling off a random things I have learned about the laste H.H. Thank God he is who he is!

Starting a blog

Hello world! I am starting a blog today for a couple reasons.
1. I am bored at work sometimes and why not share with the world what randomly goes through my head.
2. My family and friends can keep up with the happening in my life because I am usually crazy busy as are they!
3. Finally because sometimes I like to make an ass out of myself by spelling like a 5 year old and saying things that should not be said out loud only kept in my head!

So here it goes I hope I dont screw it up too badly!